HASH REPORT 50
(OR THE LAST REPORT OF AN OLD LAG)

The green fields of the Kathmandu va1ley reverberated to the cries of ON ON as nearly forty orange shirted hashers celebrated the fiftieth running of the hash. This colourful pageant got under way after all the press photographers ware satisfied, and followed a tortuous and beguiling trail laid by the venerable hash masters. The trail had everything, two false trails at one check, back checks and one subtle ploy that had the less experienced members crossing water. The old lags knew of course that the hash masters never got their feet wet.

New faces were many, old faces were red and young faces were tuned looked anxiously for aped paters puffing behind. But all looked resplendent in their new strip. The spectacle was magnificent and thanks should be extended to ACRES for their generosity. Your personal thanks may be directed in the usual manner (a case of beer or 2 cans of Heineken) to Messrs Russel, Cruikshank, Jackson, Noval, Allen, Roberts and Nielsen for accepting a cut in salary to give you those shirts. It should be noted that a veteran of SNC (the original hash shirt donors) spent the evening muttering darkly and promising an escalation in the commercial sponsor war for the 100th hash. Rumours of full strip, shoes and warm up suits abound.

After the run the press photographers again surrounded the hash and Heineken got some unpaid for publicity. The hash choir master had his charges practicing once again (& they needed it) and ACRES executives were selling shirts for three times the cost! About this time a bloody AustXXXXXX was searching late & in vain for the hash site. He must be deaf not to have heard the orange clad choir and blind not to see it, but may be he did!!!

The scene shifted later in the evening to the Hash Bash where food, beer, good music & bad singing were provided for hashers, mixed hashers and their guests. After a few warm up rounds the venerable hash masters made speeches for which they were rewarded in a venerable way. This incident is not related to the platoon of Gurkha Soldiers who visited Mr. Kedwell the next day and shaved him with razor sharp kukries. Has anyone seen Guy Stone? Did we hear in Shanta Bhawan with multiple rupture?

The hash choir recital followed and residents at the Soltee Oberoi quickly closed the windows. The sight of the choir in orange and green moved many to tears, other to the bushes or the bar and our new Irish joint hash master to utter confusion. However, the voices were raised in unison and no more then 10 different keys were heard, It was a memorable song fest and was followed in like by the mixed hash choir.

As the night wore on the party was reduced to the hard core of hashers who can normally be found waiting at checks. To those (and the rest) the eshaulted [?] cries of ON ON will next be heard on Monday 13th on the ring road bridge north of the Balaju turn off at the usual time of 5 pm.

YOU LUCKY LADS YOU !!!

The following comment was heard from a casual passer by, and should be reported "I suppose if you like looking like a puff ball fairy with diarrhoea the new shirts are OK - but the best thing to do is bury then in one of those hectares".