Everybody look normal for this one, will ya !

January was quite cold this year keeping delicate runners away from the Hash. Then spring was rather hot, while June, July and August were extra muddy. This all conspired to keep the Hash Excuse Index (HEI) much higher than last year. However in the second half of September and the first week of October the weather was downright divine and the Index plummeted. Hash numbers jumped above the psychologically crucial 30, even reaching 50 last week. But now we have Dasain vacations, a surge in excuses, and the Index returning to previous heights.

16 more or less grown, and one up-and-coming, Hashers gathered in clement conditions in Sitapaila, one of the great running areas in the valley (and therefore, surely, completely unsuitable for hashing - GM). Hares Martina and Mad Cow announced six checks with two holdings and the pack struck west on the level. But the trail soon turned uphill along the edge of a pine forest to Check 1. Sideways found paper going down again and raced off to Check 2 at the bottom of the hill near the Kathmandu-Dading highway. From here the GM found the way forward, which in this case was backwards along the highway for a few hundred metres, then up a side road and left past a nice temple to holding check 3. Martina and Mary had already got there, looking strangely serene and fresh.

Idly watching other people work is one of the great pastimes in this country which is not tolerated by the GM, especially when there are three checks left before the beer. So little time was given to enjoy the great view over the valley and the harvest activities. The trail continued downhill into the valley and through paddy fields to holding Check 4. It was Jedi, alias Goat Maiden (this week, anyway), who found the paper in the maze of paddy leading down to the Tribeni Khola. Here the hares had left the decision to the runners to either climb along a tricky little cliff or wet their feet in the river. #8, a.k.a. Casper who had been lost in the field after check 4 took the direct route through the water to lead the pack once more. Check 5 in a village higher up didn't slow down front runners much, and the same was true for Check 6. Front runners finished in less than an hour while unborn hashers took their time.

A leisurely circle formed around the hash table; with so few people there was none of the usual jostle and positioning to get a hand on a momo. Compared with last week’s wild confusion today's run was controlled and tidy. No false trails, loads of paper, and good length. There was general agreement that it was a very German sort of run which deserved MacPole's scoring 9.8.

Martina claimed an early down down for arguing with the GM, and insisting that the paper which he was following at one point could not in fact have existed. Returnee Jurgenkinder from Godawari was welcomed back, followed by Mary and Chip. These last two had been absent for so long that the GM thought perhaps they ought to be treated as virgins, but after another glance at Mary he quickly changed his mind. Bearing in mind the shaky state of the hash cash he then began to wonder at which month in pregnancy an additional hash fee might become payable. Anyway, the expectant pair almost got another beer right away for taking three weeks to get from the airport to the Hash.

Ismene and Casper accepted the Hash Peace Price on behalf of themselves, Leyla, Kofi, and the gang. Ismene was quickly called back to receive the Hashit for conspiring with 69 to deprive the Hash of cold beer. The Hash Cool Boxes had been borrowed for their joint party earlier in the week. By Saturday morning they had not reappeared so the GM went down to 69's pad only to find he had slunk off to Germany. A call to Ismene located the boxes, but she then made the astonishing offer to 'bring them with her this afternoon'. With visions of the horrific effects of warm Tuborg on the pack the GM ordered her and boxes into a taxi and straight to his house. The immediate crisis was thus averted. Further action will be taken on the return of 69, who is going to wonder how he ever went down with that hashit-envy disease he was suffering from a couple of weeks ago.

The little photo above shows what the Cannucks last week called 'fancy socks'. Apparently they didn't notice the strip of bare flesh at ankle height. The upper sections contain, nay indeed restrain, Keeled Over's calves.

OnOn

Mad Cow and Rotter