Penstock Paralysis

The first challenge of the day was getting there. Hurry Krishna thought the start was at the bottom of the hill by the Bagmati, and so hurried in from Chalnakhel and found Check 7 but no hashers. He returned to the road and finally got to the start just in time to dust himself off from keeling over on the way down the track. For some reason he was not awarded a down-down later on for the first hash-crash of the day. However, Leyla was not to get off so lightly! She was awarded the Hashit and the 'determined to get there' award for taking a taxi to the Bhanjyang and then running to the start (followed, at some distance, by her offspring, and preceded by Arthur - see below). Her taxi driver had failed to be tempted by the extra five rupees offered to take his chariot down the steep and treacherous unmade track.

Thirty-three runners huddled together in the wind at the start, admiring the views over the Bagmati and the undulating terraced landscape to the East. Some comments were made about the verticality of the locale and some older hashers recalled that Run 1000 had been set in the same area, but for some reason, one had not been set there since. A few minutes after 3pm the pack set off and before the day was out the well-exercised pack was to find out why a hash had not been set there since!

A confused mob headed off to the South with an even more confused hare somewhere in the front. Soon paper was going in three directions, but finally the hare found the correct trail and took the pack down, and down, and down, past Check 1 and on to Holding Check 2. Sideways was the only one to fall for a false trail cunningly laid into a hippopotamus wallowing pit (not true, the GM found an X further up the hill). By now there were two distinct groups: one loyal to the hare, and the rest made up of a mutinous bunch of short cutters who, on looking around at the challenging terrain, had become suspicious of the hare's intentions and decided to slink back to the chariots.

The loyalists carried on ever downwards only to find an "X" which stopped them from fording the Bagmati. It's amazing to think that the hashes in the 1980s used to regularly ford this foul channel; although even then the perils of coming into contact with those holy waters was well-recognised. Holding Check 3 was on the far side of the footbridge to Pharsidol. Five enlightened loyalists turncoats/mutinous loyalists doubled back to the vicinity of Holding Check 7 and on back up to the chariots. God knows where the religious advisor got to ? (I believe he was Advising the the mutineers - GM)

The pack was dwindling rapidly by now. The true loyalists (Sideways, Jedi, 69, Zep, Emily, Lao Lover, Better Half, Kate, Arthur and Mike) headed North along the banks of the Bagmati, up on through the brick-making fields to Check 4, and on to Check 5. They then headed back down a winding track through terraced fields to arrive at Check 6 at a burning ghat by the Bagmati. A low hung bamboo bridge led the fatigued loyalists back across the river to the track on the western bank and on to the final holding check.

This hash provided a novel alternative to the usual leisurely downhill stroll from the last check to the beer. Those with the energy left to raise their eyes from the ground at Check 7 were heard to exclaim: "surely not!!' and other more graphic expletives on seeing the 'road' home. The hare shouted "on home" and the remaining troopers headed off past the homeward arrow at the bottom face of the final challenge: 800 metres (as the crow flies) of 'steepish' steps beside the penstock pipes which led back up to the start.

Little thought was given to the history of the place, which, starting in 1911 provided electric light to the Rana palaces in the Valley. Little thought was given to the people who had to carry those pipes from Bhimphedi (near Hetauda), to Chiso Paani Gadi, to Kulekhani, and eventually to Pharping. A lot of thought was given to hoped-for revenge on the hare and to the beer at the top. Some of the ungrateful loyalists even suggested that the hare be thrown into the water for setting such an arduous one. Thankfully the true connoisseurs won the day as honorary scorer 69 awarded a well-deserved 9.8.

As well as this and the somewhat questionable practice of hot coffee, muffins and egg mayonnaise sandwiches being served, we welcomed back returnees Mike, in from Jhapa, and 1985 hash video superstar Arthur (He SAYS his hash name is 'The King'. I need corroboration from other older hashers before I can let such a truly majestic appellation in - GM). Also back was MacPole, complaining that he couldn't get his daughter upgraded into business class with him on the plane back. Of course there was no question of him downgrading to be able to sit with her!

As the sun set and the west wind cleared the dust away a dead lizard floating in the drinking water tank reminded the assembled throng of their mortality and left Sideways pondering whether or not his vintage Toyota Corolla would make it back up the track to the main road. Very few other drivers waited to find out.

From an original distorted account of the day's events by the Fox, heavily edited by Keeled Over

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