The GM was looking forwards to a quiet circle as, at ten minutes past the starting time, the number of willing participants had only just crept into double figures. However, the GM's calling of the assembled thronglet to order heralded the arrival of a convoy of vehicles led by the World Food Programme and a clapped out Landrover of an even earlier vintage than the GM's!

The beginning of this eight check hash took a similar course to a previous Rotter hash that started from the same place in March 2003. The paper led down through the brickworks and potato fields towards the thickly forested flanks of Nankhel Heights. After a bit of wiggling around the trail led inevitably up and up and up and up and up and up. The slog up the steepening hillside was only interrupted by Grumble reading off the metres of ascent on his fancy new watch with built-in altimeter.

From check 4, just below the ridge, the pack soon found the main holding check on the top of the ridge by a large tree. This was not the highest point of the run as the pack soon found the paper leading further eastwards on up the thickly forested slopes. Only Keeled checked the wrong way. He found himself alone and unable to pick up the paper again until he scrambled out of the Quercus semecarpifolia thicket at the bottom of the slope having taken the directissimo route down through the forest.

Griot stepped in to the circle to hand out a 9.9 score for Rotter's run and Socksucker's walk. Most of the virgins and newcomers seemed to be related to either Shrivelled or Grumble in one way or another. On the same subject Shrivelled got the pocket billiards award for the week. Zamilla was had for stealing a foot from Thamel and was awarded the hash epithet of Tuna Dip for yet again polishing off most of Durga's mix of the same name.

Down-downs were then dished out to:

•  Grumble for recording the more than 300m of climb on his new timepiece

•  Shrivelled and James G for being late

•  renowned latecomers Hurry Krishna and Griot for being on time

•  John ‘Sunglasses' Moore for religiously calling "on-on" at every piece of paper and for carrying a rucksack round the course.

Shrivelled then kept the company entertained and outraged with a series of monologues that involved publicly humiliating Grumblewald, Grumble's daughter, and himself. The whole affair brought into question the hash's status as a family-friendly hash. He thentook over procee presented visiting Israelite Yuron with an I Love Palestine t-shirt. The subsequent down-down for peace and love was well received and made a change to the usual hard-bitten cynicism that characterises the hash these days. Yuron's reluctance to wear this product of the Palestinian rag trade cost him dearly as he got the Hashit for failing to keep it on.

Thanks to Durga ‘Mrs Rotter' Potter for the snacks. Note that next week's hash will leave Keeled Kottage at the slightly later time of 3.30pm.